The Worst and Best Reality TV Shows

I’ve been thinking a LOT lately about the horrible state of affairs in America and often complain how pervasive reality TV is. I consider it a mind-numbing toxin that is dimming the collective brain cells of our human intellect. But then again, some reality TV shows make for GREAT viewing, even the ones that are PURE garbage.

So to be fair I went back and thought about all the reality TV shows that I have witnessed over the past few decades. Here is my list of the BEST and WORST of “reality” TV land. As always, these are listed in no particular order, just pure stream of consciousness. Let us know what you think. Which ones did I miss on? Which do you agree with?

Let’s start with the “best.” By best, I mean the most entertaining. Just like when you slow down to look when you drive past a car wreck across the divider on the highway I give you the “BEST” of reality TV:

The “BEST”
* Last Comic Standing (nothing better than really good comedy for my money)
* Master Chef / Iron Chef / Top Chef (how can they make such great food in 30 minutes with a can of mayo, ginger snaps, ox tongue and cherries…a caloric McGyver!
* Project Runway – I love it when it gets “catty”
* Dallas Cowboys cheerleader tryouts (ONLY because I’m a Cowboys fan!!!)
* Next Food Network Star
* Extreme Makeover – I love when they change someone’s life in a positive way forever
* Dog The Bounty Hunter – he’s a GREAT man
* Beauty and the Geek (proves there’s hope for us all)
* America’s Best Dance Crew (just because I like to move it, move it)
* American Idol (I love when the really bad performers get skewered)
* Cake Boss (I live in Hoboken so that’s the only reason I need)
* The Apprentice (a nice case study on the most narcissistic, ego-maniacal freak in existence (yes, Donald I’m talking about YOU!)
* Celebrity Rehab – you shouldn’t NEED an explanation ‘cuz it’s pure THEATER
* Dancing With the Stars (Emmet Smith and Michael Irvin…I’m still waiting on Troy Aikman to make an appearance so we have The Triplets.)
* Breaking Bonaduce & The Hasselhoffs – I get nostalgic for the 1970s & 1980s sometimes.

The WORST – These can also be the “best” depending on how you define BEST. Some of these make for the best entertainment value of anything on TV that’s NOT created by Seth MacFarlane, South Park or the Jon Stewart show.

* The Real Housewives of ____ (does it matter which city they air this train wreck?)
* Keeping Up With the Kardashians (but ONLY because Kim broke up with Miles Austin.)
* 16 & Pregnant – This show is just plain wrong on SO many levels.
* A shot of love with tila tequila (1 & 2) – I’m all for personal branding when it comes to career and professional development. Just NOT HER!!!
* Kendra (because Hank Baskett was an Eagle.)
* Jersey Shore (can also be a “BEST.” I shake my head sadly when I think of Snooki and repeat to myself…”Only in America.”)
* Rock of Love (But I loved Brett in the Celebrity Apprentice.)
* Queer Eye for the Straight Guy – not all straight guys need 5 gay men to turn themselves into a catch.
* The real world – really…REALLY…it’s the “REAL” world???
* Steven Seagal Lawman – he is just disgusting.
* Toddlers and Tiaras – but hey, it’s real in Texas.
* Paris Hilton’s my New BFF – she may just be the anti-Christ in not so subtle disguise.
* Newlyweds: Nick & Jessica (but only because I wanted Jessica and Tony Romo to work out.)
* My big fat obnoxious boss (reality TV’s supposed to be an ESCAPE from reality, not a reminder that you left work and are sitting at home thinking about your…”Big fat obnoxious boss.”
* Gene Simmons family jewels – I’m still upset they issued Kiss Alive II.
* Flavor of Love (sorry, it’s self-explanatory)
* Bridezillas – and yet it can be instructive for any man getting ready to pop the BIG question.
* The Anna Nichol show (there should have been an intervention. In all seriousness…how sad her life was.)
* America’s next top model – I watch with my wife and daughter, and scream at the TV that I want to tie each of the contestants down and force feed them a Big Mac.
* The biggest loser (they should gain the weight back then join comedian Ralphy May on tour.
* The Bachelor and Bachelorette: Hearing all the shenanigans that went on behind the scenes made me question the truthfulness of ALL my beloved reality TV shows.
* Survivor: forget all those “exotic” far away places, they should have been dropped into the sets of Mad Max, Escape from New York, or downtown Detroit.

Well, what do you think?